Charge adult children rent

Kylie

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Should parents charge their adult children rent?

Why or why not?
 

JennyorAlice

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Well, they should help out with something. Either make them pay rent or make them help out with the utilities or the groceries. Something.....

They'd have to pay for all that if they were living on their own. Why should living with their parents be any different.
 

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Hasta La Vista, Baby
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Yes. I think if you get to the legal age of being an adult. You should get a job and pay tribute to your parents or save up to 2 thousand dollars, keep your check stubs, and find an apartment or rental house and move out.
 

Demon_skeith

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My parents allowed me to stay rent free so long as I was in school which was a fair arrangement, which I always helped out around the house to earn my keep.
 

Kylie

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Probably and usually, but every situation is different.

The most important factor is why is the adult child at home?

Are they temporarily living there until they find their own home and/or job? Are they home because a parent needs assistance? Does the adult child have a disability that means they can’t earn enough to support themselves? Are the parents so wealthy it would be ridiculous to ask for a contribution to expenses?

Usually, if an adult child has a job, they have a responsibility to at least contribute to household expenses, if not actual rent. Why? Because letting mom and dad continue to support them when they have the means to support themselves is called mooching. Usually, I hasten to add.

I have seen situations where parents are supporting capable adult children well into middle-age, and the parents are giving up things they themselves need. For instance, a house needs repair, the car breaks down often, etc. But the “child” at home doesn’t even help with groceries, doesn’t even try to get a job, etc.

Certainly it is nobody else’s business how a family functions. The parents have every right to insist the adult child contribute, and if they aren’t asking, it is their own decision. It is only my opinion that the adult child is using their parents - but it is the parents’ responsibility to ask for a fair contribution or not. Every situation is different.

Someday the parents might not be around though, and it isn’t doing the adult child any favors if they don’t know how to take care of themselves.
 

JennyorAlice

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Kylie made a good point. If the parents need assistance and the child is living at home to help the parents then it's okay. My hubby was living with his mom and grandma before we got married. He was living with them because they needed his help.
 

Kyng

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As an adult child who's still living at home, I don't pay rent - simply because my parents don't really want or need the money for anything. (My dad would maybe like a nicer car, but he feels mean charging rent just for that!)

I do, however, help out with bills every month.
 

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Hasta La Vista, Baby
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I do, however, help out with bills every month.

I respect that.

What I don't respect is that my neighbors have their daughter and her boyfriend living with them and those 2 are still having kids. That house has like 10 people living in it and it's a small house.

I don't agree with that. Because when I was having kids with my ex wife. I worked my ass off, was paying rent and a car loan. I'm still working my ass off and 11 years later, I have my own house and car. My sister works her ass off in law enforcement, has a 3 year son, her own house, and her own car. I think if you're gonna go out and screw and have kids. Don't do it while you're living with your parents. They need to grow up and be an adult about it.
 

JennyorAlice

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I respect that.

What I don't respect is that my neighbors have their daughter and her boyfriend living with them and those 2 are still having kids. That house has like 10 people living in it and it's a small house.

I don't agree with that. Because when I was having kids with my ex wife. I worked my ass off, was paying rent and a car loan. I'm still working my ass off and 11 years later, I have my own house and car. My sister works her ass off in law enforcement, has a 3 year son, her own house, and her own car. I think if you're gonna go out and screw and have kids. Don't do it while you're living with your parents. They need to grow up and be an adult about it.

I do agree that you should be able to take care of yourself before you start having children. You can't care for another life if you can't care for yourself yet.
 
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Ash

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If the parents require assistance then I don't see a problem in asking adult children for rent. If you're in the position to help them, I think it can be good to try and help them out as well by not charging rent. Over here in the UK, getting on the property ladder for young people is getting harder and harder so not having to pay rent allows you to save a lot of money to help out with a mortgage deposit.
 

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Hasta La Vista, Baby
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I do agree that you should be able to take care of yourself before you start having children. You can't care for another life if you can't care for yourself yet.

I think my biggest fear about that is having my own 2 kids go out and do that when they're barely 20. Kind of like what my mom told me and my siblings before we had kids. She doesn't want to raise our kids for us and she was always very open about me and my brother not getting someone pregnant. Her rules were if we got a woman pregnant, it was time to get a job and move out. But when I was a teenager, I didn't want kids but I was very into women when I attended high school.

My sister got pregnant, during college, and they made her get a career, my sister chose to be a police officer and she's done very well for herself. I want to enforce that rule on my own kids when they're older. I don't want my kids to bum around the house when they're 18. If they're not in college, I'm making the training wheels come off and they can save up to 1500 dollars and move out.

My mother, when I was little, was a single mother who worked her ass off raising me. Then she got remarried and had two more kids with her new husband. Now seeing as my sister and I have kids. My mother is in her early 60's and wants to retire and enjoy her old age. I can respect that and I believe she is owed that from us.

I'm not saying I won't help my kids when they're grown up. But when they're older I want encourage them to try and practice abstinence and birth control. I want to avoid my daughter getting knocked up in high school and college because I don't want to deal with the boyfriend coming around. If he were to come around, I'd run him off.

I myself would like to retire and enjoy "my old age" one day and not have to put up with any future and avoidable drama from my children. What I really want in the future, is for them to get jobs and get out there and support themselves and be successful.
 

Demon_skeith

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I think my biggest fear about that is having my own 2 kids go out and do that when they're barely 20. Kind of like what my mom told me and my siblings before we had kids. She doesn't want to raise our kids for us and she was always very open about me and my brother not getting someone pregnant. Her rules were if we got a woman pregnant, it was time to get a job and move out. But when I was a teenager, I didn't want kids but I was very into women when I attended high school.

My sister got pregnant, during college, and they made her get a career, my sister chose to be a police officer and she's done very well for herself. I want to enforce that rule on my own kids when they're older. I don't want my kids to bum around the house when they're 18. If they're not in college, I'm making the training wheels come off and they can save up to 1500 dollars and move out.

My mother, when I was little, was a single mother who worked her ass off raising me. Then she got remarried and had two more kids with her new husband. Now seeing as my sister and I have kids. My mother is in her early 60's and wants to retire and enjoy her old age. I can respect that and I believe she is owed that from us.

I'm not saying I won't help my kids when they're grown up. But when they're older I want encourage them to try and practice abstinence and birth control. I want to avoid my daughter getting knocked up in high school and college because I don't want to deal with the boyfriend coming around. If he were to come around, I'd run him off.

I myself would like to retire and enjoy "my old age" one day and not have to put up with any future and avoidable drama from my children. What I really want in the future, is for them to get jobs and get out there and support themselves and be successful.

I do have an aunt that I often hear my grandma say she was so happy she never had kids, since she can never take care of herself.
 

JennyorAlice

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I think my biggest fear about that is having my own 2 kids go out and do that when they're barely 20. Kind of like what my mom told me and my siblings before we had kids. She doesn't want to raise our kids for us and she was always very open about me and my brother not getting someone pregnant. Her rules were if we got a woman pregnant, it was time to get a job and move out. But when I was a teenager, I didn't want kids but I was very into women when I attended high school.

My sister got pregnant, during college, and they made her get a career, my sister chose to be a police officer and she's done very well for herself. I want to enforce that rule on my own kids when they're older. I don't want my kids to bum around the house when they're 18. If they're not in college, I'm making the training wheels come off and they can save up to 1500 dollars and move out.

My mother, when I was little, was a single mother who worked her ass off raising me. Then she got remarried and had two more kids with her new husband. Now seeing as my sister and I have kids. My mother is in her early 60's and wants to retire and enjoy her old age. I can respect that and I believe she is owed that from us.

I'm not saying I won't help my kids when they're grown up. But when they're older I want encourage them to try and practice abstinence and birth control. I want to avoid my daughter getting knocked up in high school and college because I don't want to deal with the boyfriend coming around. If he were to come around, I'd run him off.

I myself would like to retire and enjoy "my old age" one day and not have to put up with any future and avoidable drama from my children. What I really want in the future, is for them to get jobs and get out there and support themselves and be successful.

That's understandable. There are times when the kids need to grow up and start taking care of themselves. But there are times when you need help. It's okay to ask for help from time to time when life throws a lemon at you. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself and not mooch off your parents anymore. One day, your parents are going to be gone and can't help you anymore so you can't spend your whole life bumming off your parents.
 

Lämmchen

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When our daughter moved from another state to live with us until she found full time employment we did not charge her anything. She needed to save up for first and last month's rent as well as the security deposit. When rent is $1,500 then multiple that by 3 and it's a huge chunk of cash to come up with.

My nephew almost moved in with us and even though my dad teased we would never get him to move out, we weren't going to charge him rent for the same reasons...saving to get his own place. Come to think of it, I probably should have charge him some money from each paycheck to automatically go into a fund to get him out?
 

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